My World

I had just had a really tough day on Tuesday and was really enjoying my day "off" with Timberlyn the next day.

I wasn't quite up to being 100% myself and with that I decided to just "be" with her.

3 year olds are a great way to be around someone and not feel judged, criticized, performance based or demanding of more than you have to give.  (Don't get me wrong, they are demanding but usually it's fairly easy to meet their needs).

I wanted to pass the time until playgroup and since this one was actually in my neighborhood I rationalized I can put on "mom clothes" and take Timberlyn for a walk until I it was time and I decided I was ready to be somewhat social.

That's when it happened...an "Ah-ha" moment.

I was pushing her in the stroller and she said she saw some "worms" on the sidewalk.  I thought about just saying "uh-huh" and moving forward and then I didn't.  I stopped and turned back and said "No babe those aren't worms, it's part of the tree/leaves that have fallen down, gotten wet and some have been trampled".  I then proceeded to show her these growths from the tree and how they probably fell, etc.  We then turned back to continue on our path and I mentioned that the reason we don't see them beneath every tree is because each tree is different and unique...and then made some comment about how I don't know the names to all the trees (except Pine!) but that God made them all, each and every kind.

It hit me...My world wouldn't have made it!

In my finite mind I probably would've gone with only 1 type of tree...not realizing the delicate balance and reasoning behind the varieties.  And, if I couldn't even get the nature right and diversified what in the world would I have come up with for the other ecosystems?

It's kind of funny, but serious at the same time.

I realize often how it's a good thing I'm not (and never was) "in charge"!
and I'm SO very thankful that the Lord is teaching me that His ways are higher.
I am finally starting to "get it" and instead of asking for X I don't want to put God in a box...He is infinitely more creative and all-knowing and I want what He has planned for me, instead of what I have planned for me!